


ImPaired

by Follery



Category: matsu family - Fandom, おそ松さん | Osomatsu-san (Anime)
Genre: 'cause i'm lazy hgjsdhkg, (a month late), (whoops), AU, Accidents, Baking, Birthday, Cake, Cuddling, Explosion, Fluff, Gen, Hide and Seek, IMG, ImPaired AU, Nightmares, Pampering, Running Away, Sickfic, Some angst, Will tag as I go I guess, beach visit, bird park, birthday fic, blind!karamatsu, cake baking, choukei, choukeimatsu, deaf!osomatsu, dumb butts, forgetting disabilities, gdi totty dhsjkgkjsghsd, happy end, i guess, nightmares again, oso blease, oso has a nightmare problem, oso is a frustrated but fluffy boi, oso is a good big bro, oso my boy, oso your anxiety is showing, smart dumb bois, this is so. fluff., time skip, trip to the hospital, what do I even tag this, why is this the fluffiest au and fic i have
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-03
Updated: 2019-08-22
Packaged: 2019-10-20 09:37:14
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 11
Words: 14,648
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17619992
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Follery/pseuds/Follery
Summary: One can't hear. One can't see.But they can bothfeel.





	1. Forever.

**Author's Note:**

> the ones that follow my tumblr know i've been drawing some stuff about this au lmao  
> idk how many chapters i'll do of this

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> For better or for worse.

 

........

......

.......

....

 

He kept staring at the heart monitor.

His  _own_  heart monitor, presumably, considering that it was attached to him. And obviously there  _was_  a pulse, blipping across the screen fairly often.

So why didn't he  _hear it?_

Or do they not actually make any sound in real life, unlike in movies? No, wait, he's pretty sure they do. These things are practically  _known_  for beeping and then flatlining with that *beeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee* sound, and then the main character cries over their dead grandpa or something.

 

Osomatsu ran his hands over his ears - or, he  _would_  have, if he hadn't made contact with the strange cloth wrapped around his head laterally, making him withdraw his hands in surprise. The bandages covered his ears, and he wasn't sure if there was something damp he felt on the cloth.

....wait, wait, hold on,  _before_  all this, why the heck is he in the hospital in the  _first_ place!?

 

 

He flinched, startled at the hand that suddenly landed on his shoulder without a single warning. When his head whipped up, he came face to face with a nurse.

The nurse's mouth was moving, but.... he couldn't hear anything she was saying. Was she saying anything at all?

 

The nurse seemed like she remembered something, and then grabbed a small whiteboard that was at Osomatsu's bedside. With the marker attached to the board, she wrote down a few words.

"How are you feeling?" the writing read.

 

"Kinda weird," Osomatsu tried to say, but something was wrong. Did any voice come out at all? He had no idea. He could feel vibrations, but was there any sound...?

The nurse handed over the whiteboard. Yeah, maybe it's a good idea for him to just write for now....

 

"What happened?" he asked in writing. He tried to add "How did I get here" through speaking, but again, he wasn't sure any of it came out at all.

"Explosion at Akatsuka Mall's restaurant. A fault in the gasline," the nurse wrote. "You were in the establishment."

R...Right. He was in the restaurant, sitting there, and then.... there was an absolutely  _deafening_  sound. He didn't know what happened after that.

....Wait. Wasn't he with--?

 

 

"Wh-Where's  _Karamatsu?_ " Osomatsu blurted out. He's pretty sure he accidentally yelled it out, considering the pain in his throat afterwards.

The nurse paused, before writing "Ward 409".

 

Osomatsu shot off the hospital bed, having detached the heart monitor's attachment that was wrapped around his finger. He felt a hand try to grab his arm, to stop him from leaving the room, but he didn't obey.

He marched out, taking a glance at his own ward door as he left it. Ward 405. Karamatsu's shouldn't be too far away.

He opened the ward door a little too swiftly, accidentally making the door collide with the wall inside. But no sound was produced.

Or, at least, no sound was  _heard_.

 

The man in the hospital bed was awake, sitting up, but.... but something was wrong. His eyes were bandaged over, covered. If not to blind him, it was  _because_  he was.... well...

 

Karamatsu's head tilted up upon Osomatsu's arrival, and his mouth moved, but Osomatsu didn't hear a word. He  _couldn't_  hear a word.

The nurse from earlier came in soon after, and, after guiding Osomatsu to Karamatsu's bedside, began conversing with the younger brother. Osomatsu could see their mouths moving, could see Karamatsu reacting to things being said by the nurse, but... he couldn't hear it. He couldn't hear  _any_ of it.

 

 

The nurse must have said something of note, because Karamatsu suddenly began to blindly wave his arm towards his left, perhaps trying to grab something. Then he turned to his right, waving his arm again, before his hand collided into Osomatsu's body.

Osomatsu took hold of Karamatsu's hand, giving it a squeeze. It was warm.

He saw a smile form on Karamatsu's face, and Karamatsu began talking again. The smile weakened when he was met with no response.

Because Osomatsu  _couldn't_  respond, to something he hadn't  _heard_.

 

The nurse seemed to explain something to Karamatsu, presumably, because Karamatsu made an "Oh" expression with his mouth, and his eyebrows raised in understanding.

Osomatsu brought his other hand over to their linked ones, closing it around his little brother's. Karamatsu's smile returned, and his grip got tighter.

As did the elder's.

 

 

* * *

 

 

"I should take him back to his own ward now," the nurse stated.

"A-Ah, alright."

 

Karamatsu heard the faint sound of something hitting and gliding across a smooth surface, and after a few moments the warmth around his hand disappeared.

He missed it quickly, dearly.

"Do take care, Matsuno-san," he heard the nurse say, before the sound of the door clicking shut was emitted.

 

Karamatsu sighed. There was definitely something  _blindingly_  bright before he blacked out. He had a feeling that there was a sound as well, but the sound was heavily dampened by the noise-cancelling headphones he was trying on, having just bought them before he and Osomatsu decided to go for lunch.

From what the nurse explained, it seemed that Osomatsu had gone deaf from the same event. That would certainly explain why he didn't respond to Karamatsu's greetings.

 

....It seems as though their lives may have changed  _forever_. For better or for worse, Karamatsu could not tell just yet.

...all he knew right now was that he  _really_  needed to pee.

And he doesn't know where the bathroom is.

 

 

He'd rather not soil the very bed he'll sleep on, so he carefully slid his legs off the mattress and onto the cold floor, in the hopes of finding the bathroom. Maybe, once he exits his ward, if he blindly waves his arms around as he walks his hand'll bump into a toilet sign. Yeah, fool-proof idea right there.

He's joking.

 

He placed his hand on the wall, keeping contact with it as he stepped forward slowly. Eventually, he bumped into a corner, door hinges included. Which probably meant the door handle was on the other side.

Upon opening the door, certain sounds became louder, such as the footsteps of people walking about and things of some sort rolling across the floor. He wasn't sure what. Whelchairs, maybe?

 

He tried to listen for the sound of water. If there was a running tap, that's probably where the toilet is... Unfortunately, there seemed to be none to be heard. Maybe he should just--?

 

He flinched, a hand wrapping around his bicep. He hadn't been paying attention to the footsteps approaching him.

But there was no voice that came from the person who grabbed his arm. The person's other hand went to hold Karamatsu's.

The hand was warm. The same warmth from earlier.

 

 

"O-Osomatsu?" Karamatsu stuttered, surprised. "Aren't you supposed to be in your own ward...?"

No response.

The hand on Karamatsu's arm let go, but the one holding his hand didn't. A finger began rubbing against his skin, at the back of his palm.

...No, wait, it's not just rubbing. It's...  _writing_.

 

"...na...ni... ya... Ah," Karamatsu muttered to himself, realising that Osomatsu wrote "What are you doing?" in  _Hiragana_  onto his hand. He brought his free hand over to their linked ones, writing "I need the toilet" onto the back of his older brother's.

Osomatsu gave his hand a reassuring squeeze before walking him to the restroom.

 

 

* * *

 

 

_3 months pass...._

 

* * *

"[Nii-san,]" Todomatsu spoke as he gestured the same words in sign language, standing at the doorway of the bedroom, while facing his eldest brother on the couch, "[do you want me to buy anything for you?]"

[Some snacks would be nice, I think,] Osomatsu signed in response, giving a small smile.

Todomatsu flashed an 'OK' sign, before closing the door and, presumably, going down the stairs and heading out.

 

Osomatsu turned back to his comic book, and was about to continue reading until he noticed movement at the corner of his vision. He looked up, seeing that his dozing little brother had finally begun to stir.

He walked over, sitting next to his dazed, sleepy brother and combing back Karamatsu's fringe. Karamatsu turned his head, facing the source of the new sensation as he partially opened his eyes.

Their eyes made contact for a very small moment - not that Karamatsu knew that, of course.

 

Osomatsu saw the younger's mouth move, groggily, but he had never been good at lip-reading. So he reached for Karamatsu's hand, grabbing it with one hand and writing onto the back of it with the other.

{Hi Kara.}

Karamatsu's face morphed into a smiling one, squeezing Osomatsu's hand in response. He brought his other hand over to reply.

{Morning.}

 

 

* * *


	2. Wish

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Wishes are for the hopeful.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> just a short one

The stars were beautiful tonight, Osomatsu thought to himself.

 

He had taken his little brother out for a walk, out to the park, and they were now lying down on the grassy hill, simply relaxing in the night. Osomatsu was staring up at the stars, peppered across the entire pitch-black void, sparkling like little diamonds. Around them was grass, including plenty of grass flowers, the white petals swaying in the soft breeze. Some birds flew across the sky, colourful and, perhaps, magical.

He sighed, squeezing the hand that he was holding, as he turned to look at his younger brother next to him. Karamatsu turned to his general direction, smiling, as he reciprocated the squeeze.

 

...He wished Karamatsu could see what he was seeing.

 

 

* * *

 

 

The crickets sounded wonderful tonight, Karamatsu thought to himself.

 

The songs of the crickets were accompanied by the gentle hooting of owls, sitting in trees with softly rustling leaves. The grass around his brother and he bristled quietly, but audibly, as wind blew over the hill they lay on, producing a  _whoosh_  sound as it did so. He could occasionally hear some birds flapping their wings as they flew, perhaps heading home to their nests, or heading out for the start of their nocturnal night.

Karamatsu heard a near-silent sigh, and his older brother's hand gripping his tighter. Karamatsu turned his head towards Osomatsu in response, returning the squeeze and giving a smile.

 

...He wished Osomatsu could hear what he was hearing.

 

 

* * *

 

 

_There was, suddenly, a faint, strange hissing sound._

A bolt of light shot across the sky.

 

_That direction is... the nearby lamp post, right?_

Several more similar lights appeared.... Could it be...?

 

_He'd heard about this before. This was the sound of..._

...shooting stars.

 

_The sound travels as radiowaves from the shooting star, before vibrating off a metal object on the ground... such as a nearby lamp post._

Hold on, enough thinking - Shouldn't they be making a wish or something?

 

_...I want Osomatsu to be happy._

...I want Karamatsu to be happy.

_....I want to be with him._

....I want to be with him.

 

_The soft hissing sound then faded off._

The streaks of light then disappeared.

 

 

* * *

 

 

After the soft hissing sound disappeared completely, Karamatsu reached,  _blindly_ , for his elder brother, hoping to hug him.

He made contact with his face. It was damp.

 

"O-Osomatsu!?" He hurriedly rubbed at his older brother's tears with his free hand. "H-Hey, why are you crying...!?" he blurted out, despite full knowledge that Osomatsu couldn't  _hear_ him.

Osomatsu said nothing, simply wrapping his hand around Karamatsu's, curling his fingers around Karamatsu's palm. A source of warmth came closer to Karamatsu's face, before pressing into his forehead.

He could practically ' _see'_ his elder brother's thoughts.

 

_I love you so, so much_.

 

 

* * *

 

 

He hadn't expected himself to cry, simply thinking about their future. But he could see the slight panic in Karamatsu's face when the younger became aware of his tears.

He simply closed his hand around Karamatsu's, observing his worried expression, before pulling himself forward to press their foreheads together, mouthing a completely silent, truthfully honest, statement.

 

Even Osomatsu could ' _hear'_  the words Karamatsu had replied, with the way he smiled so earnestly, the way he squeezed his eyes shut so happily.

 

_I love you too. So, so much._

* * *


	3. Beach Visit

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> because i drew them going to the beach in [that tumblr post](http://follerys-trash-blog.tumblr.com/post/182535903409/da-beets-beach)

"[Hey, nii-sans,]" Todomatsu signed and spoke simultaneously, "[do you two want to go to the beach today?]"

 

Osomatsu just tilted his head curiously, still sitting next to Karamatsu at the table. [Would that really be a good idea?] he replied in sign.

"[Of course it's a good idea! Just because you two are impaired doesn't mean you shouldn't enjoy yourselves! Plus, it's summer, so the beach is a good place to go!]"

"I suppose so," Karamatsu hummed. "Will it be all six of us?"

"[The others are busy with other things, so it'd be just the three of us. Ichimatsu-nii-san went to a cat cáfe with Choromatsu-nii-san i think, and Jyuushimatsu-nii-san's watching some sort of baseball match at the stadium.]"

 

[B-But still, what i-if like... What if--?]

"[Oh relax, Osomatsu-nii-san, it'll be fine!]" Todomatsu had a wide smile on his face. "[You guys have each other, right? You both make up for the other's missing sense. And if anything happens, I'm here to help you two too!]"

"Totty, do you remember where I put my jorts?"

Todomatsu stopped his hand signs, making a blank face. "Nii-san, I forbid you from wearing that."

"Eh..."

 

 

* * *

 

 

Osomatsu continued to help his little brother dress himself, having picked out some clothes for him. Normal swimming shorts, not jorts, because jorts are  _horrid_. According to Todomatsu, at least.

 

Osomatsu pulled the blue flower-patterned shirt onto Karamatsu, similar to the red one Osomatsu was wearing. He reached to button it up... but stopped.

He looks cooler this way, actually, with his shirt unbuttoned like this. He'd like that.

 

As a finishing touch, he placed Karamatsu's signature sunglasses onto his younger brother's face, before grabbing Karamatsu's hand and writing on it.

{You look super cool, Kara.}

An obvious smile spread across the younger's face, before he brought his hand up to reply.

{Thank you, aniki.}

 

 

* * *

 

 

"Wonderful beaach~!!" Karamatsu heard his youngest brother sing as soon as they stepped off of the bus. The sounds of the city weren't present here, replaced by the squawks of the seagulls and the crashing of the waves against the shore. He heard some children playing, splashing about in the sea water, as the warmth of the sun shone against his face.

Seems like a nice summer.

 

"C'mon, nii-sans, it's been a long ride. Let's find a beach chair to relax at first!" Todomatsu exclaimed. He must have hand-signed it as well, because Karamatsu could feel his elder brother's arm, wrapped around his own, beginning to tug him along. Presumably, towards the beach.

Definitely the beach. Karamatsu's blind-aiding cane bumped into the sand, the impact far softer than when it hit the concrete of the pavement earlier. Some more walking later, and it touched the plastic leg of a beach chair, producing a quiet clatter sound.

 

He could feel the breeze blowing through the beach as Osomatsu helped him into the chair, the wind blowing through his hair and across his face. The leaves of the palm trees rustled together with it, the air carrying the scent of the sea.

 

So many things that Karamatsu would never have paid much attention to, had he not been blind.

 

 

* * *

 

 

[You'll have to have your hearing aids off while you swim,] Todomatsu signed to the elder, holding onto Osomatsu's hearing aids, [but since Karamatsu-nii-san's with you, you should be fine! He can tell you if there's any alarm sound or anything. I'll sit here at the chair and take care of all our stuff.]

[And update your twitter?] Osomatsu asked with a smile.

Todomatsu visibly laughed. [Of course!]

 

Karamatsu seemed impatient, almost bouncing in place. Looks like he really wants to swim - hell, his blind eyes seemed to be  _sparkling_. So with their shirts off and their hands linked together, they headed to the boundary between the sand and the sea.

 

 

Karamatsu jumped in surprise when the cold water first touched his feet, the liquid grasping at it with such ferocity, but calmed when Osomatsu squeezed his hand reassuringly. Slowly, they waded their way into the water, making sure they didn't go too deep.

The older brother lay back, allowing himself to float horizontally on the water's surface. The clouds were plentiful, scattered across the blue sky. The sun shone across the sea, and across Osomatsu as well, the comforting warmth unending. Osomatsu just closed his eyes, taking it all in.

Meanwhile, Karamatsu sank himself into the water, letting go of Osomatsu's hand to paddle about.

 

Struck by a stroke of inspiration, Osomatsu righted himself and waded, making a small distance between him and his younger brother. He turned to face him and made splashes in the water, his hands crashing against the water's surface, and attempted to say Karamatsu's name.

Karamatsu heard the splashes (or his voice?), turning to Osomatsu's general direction. Osomatsu held his arms out, making continuous splashes with one hand, as Karamatsu slowly made his way to him, like a toddler who had just learned how to walk making his way over to his parent.

 

 

When he reached his destination, Osomatsu coiled his arms around him and hoisted him up, spinning around as he laughed, the water swishing about around them. He couldn't  _hear_  Karamatsu's accompanying laughs, but he could  _feel_  their foreheads pressing together as Karamatsu's arms wrapped around him, as the smile on the younger's face widened instantly.

His smile was warm. His stupidly  _cute_ smile. Why'd his baby brother have to be so damn cute?

 

When he finally stopped spinning, Osomatsu lowered his little brother back down, still holding him close.

Totty probably got pictures of that entire thing for his twitter or something, the eldest thought to himself.

 

 

* * *

 

 

"Karamatsu-nii-san, check out my sandcastle!!" Todomatsu said excitedly, grabbing Karamatsu's hand. He guided his older brother's hand to the surface of the compacted sand, letting Karamatsu run his palms over it to feel its shape.

"It looks good!" Karamatsu exclaimed, missing the irony in his sentence. "I like the shells around this pillar. What colour are they?"

"They're all white! Oh, except the biggest one in the middle, that one's black."

 

"It's wonderful, Totty." Karamatsu smiled, a clear image of the sand castle in his head. "Oh, have you seen what I made?"

"Yeah! Your sand guitar is super  _super_  cool! Just like you, Kara-nii..!!"

"Aw, thank you--"

 

Karamatsu was interrupted by a hand grabbing his bicep, pulling him elsewhere. The hand guided his onto a surface of compacted sand, letting him run his palms over it to feel its shape. With this long, middle part and the two smaller....

....God damn it, did Osomatsu make another  _chinko!?_ He's sure Osomatsu could see the mixed expression of disgust and amusement on his own face. Scratch that - he  _definitely_ saw it, considering the loud chuckle afterwards.

 

Karamatsu decided to shove off the top of the middle part, earning a squeak of surprise from his elder brother.  _Someone_ has to make sure the children at this beach don't see  _that_. Although it may have already been too late...

 

 

* * *

 

 

[It's getting late, we should probably head home,] Todomatsu signed to the oldest brother. [But I wanna take a picture first!]

The youngest guided Osomatsu (and Karamatsu by extension through his hand linked with the eldest) to a spot on the beach, their backs facing the sea, before backing up and pulling out his phone, signing [Smile!] with his free hand.

 

Osomatsu noted that Karamatsu's face was facing the wrong way, so he pressed his hand into his cheek to turn it, inadvertently making the elder kiss the other cheek.

Okay, maybe not ' _inadvertently_ ', a-and maybe Karamatsu's face wasn't in the wrong way at  _all,_  and m-maybe his own face was  _already_  close enough to kiss his baby brother's cheek and  _goddamnit_  he just loves his stupid little baby brother to  _bits_.

 

Karamatsu's smile just widened as he laughed. Did he even know that Todomatsu was taking a picture? The youngest may not have even said out loud what he signed for the blind one's benefit. He probably would have tried striking a cool pose otherwise.

 

Todomatsu gave an OK sign, and then proceeded to say something.  _Now_ , Karamatsu struck a pose as Todomatsu took another picture. Afterwards, he signed at Osomatsu to keep the earlier picture's details silent.

Hey, isn't this kinda mean!?

 

 

* * *

 


	4. the usual fics but in this au

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> of course i have to do a nightmarefic + sickfic in this au

Nowadays, he's not sure if any sound he tries to make even comes out at  _all_.

But Osomatsu knew for a fact that this time, he had yelled, perhaps  _screamed_ , as he jolted awake, evident by the soreness of his throat, stinging and raw.

 

The dream... Well, he didn't really  _want_ to think about it, but... the dream was about the time they were at the restaurant, right before he had gone deaf, right before  _he_  had gone blind from the following explosion.

But in this dream, instead, one was deafened by the blast while the other...  _passed_.

 

It very well  _could_  have been reality.

 

How had he not realised before? If pieces of shrapnel or debris had unluckily flown in their direction, a direct result of the explosion, Karamatsu could have  _died_. Karamatsu  ** _would_**  have  _died_. His younger brother had a straight line of sight to the blast, it  _could_  have happened, he  _would_  have died, he  _ **could**_  have  _died,_  he  _ **almost**_ \--

And now he knew he was crying. At  _what_   _volume_ , he didn't know, nor did he care. To see his little brother's  _body_  like that,  _lifeless_ ,  _ **motionless**_ ,  _mutilated beyond--_

He nearly jumped out of his skin when something bumped into his shoulder, his breath halting violently as he shot up to face the collision's culprit.

Karamatsu had been in the room after all. He reached, _blindly_ , for Osomatsu's face, making contact with the elder's damp cheek with the back of his fingers. He seemed-- No, he was  _obviously_  concerned, his eyebrows knotted together and his mouth saying something ( _inaudibly,_  to Osomatsu at least) with a worried frown.

 

Karamatsu pushed his palm into his elder brother's cheek and held it gently, asking a silent question as he rubbed at the tears with his thumb.

_Are you okay?_

When no response came, the younger reached around Osomatsu's neck, pulling him closer into a hug. Karamatsu must've been humming - The vibrations from his lungs reverberated through their connected chests, echoing through Osomatsu's soul.

He wasn't sure what song it was, but it felt like an old one. One they learned during their childhood, perhaps.

 

The elder felt his eyelids getting heavier. His head began to weigh him down as well, causing him to rest himself into the crook of Karamatsu's shoulder. Slowly, he drifted back to sleep, the song - and Karamatsu - having calmed him.

He didn't even see himself go.

 

 

* * *

 

 

His head hurts like  _hell_.

 

He shifted where he lay in the futon as he griped wordlessly from the dizziness, probably silently? He wasn't entirely sure. He could have let out the loudest groan for all he knew.

He probably did, in retrospect, because soon a cold, damp towel smacked into the middle of his face at a weird angle, reaching diagonally from his cheek to the side of his forehead.

 

It took a few tries as someone  _blindly_  tried to readjust the towel, but eventually it was at its proper spot atop Osomatsu's forehead.

When the elder opened his eyes, Karamatsu had set down a small plastic box of medicine, the one that was kept in the medicine cabinet downstairs. Did he get that by himself...?

 

 

Now, the  _problem_  was, Karamatsu's  _blind_. Sure he can try to feel the shape of the pills encased in plastic, but it's not like he  _remembered_  the shapes of those that were needed right now and those that  _weren't_.

Osomatsu saw his brother contemplating over this for a few moments, as the younger fiddled with the packets of medicine in his hands.

 

Eventually, Karamatsu reached for Osomatsu's face (missing once and hitting the front of his collarbone), turning it to face him. The younger handsigned [Yes or No], having learned limited signs from Todomatsu earlier that week.

Well, Osomatsu  _could_  sign, but it's not like his little brother can  _see_  it...??

 

Karamatsu pushed one packet of pills into his older brother's hand, then signed the same thing again. The elder realised that the pills should  _probably_  make sound, being loose enough to jangle inside their plastic casings embedded in the aluminium.

The label on this packet said it was for fevers. Osomatsu did the handsign for "Yes" with the hand holding it, closing his fist and pivoting his wrist up and down twice.

 

Karamatsu smiled, and then pulled out another packet, handing it over (colliding it into Osomatsu's arm by accident). This one was for gastric pain... He doesn't need that right now. Osomatsu did the handsign for "No", bringing his first two fingers and thumb to the aluminium sheet, before clacking his two fingers and thumb together twice, with the sheet in between.

Karamatsu nodded, taking the gastric pills and putting them into the empty side of the plastic box.

 

 

With this system, they went through all the medicine, picking out the ones Osomatsu needed. Part of the elder felt like it would be faster if he had just picked them out on his own, but it's not like he wants to sit up right now and let his light-headed head float off into oblivion. Plus, Karamatsu seemed happy to be helping.

He wants him to be happy.

 

When they were done, Karamatsu picked up the box of medicine and stood up, walked towards the door, missed, moved along the wall to find the door, and then finally slid it open and walked out.

Osomatsu held the packets of pills he needed in his hands before putting them at the side of his pillow. He should probably take them  _now_ , but... he's just so  _tired_...

 

 

A glass of water bumping into the side of his ear stopped him from falling back into slumber. Karamatsu reached for Osomatsu's shoulder, coaxing him into sitting up and pushing the glass into his hand. The elder's head refused to remain upright, so he chose to rest it against Karamatsu's shoulder instead.

Karamatsu reached around their general area, managing to locate the medicine Osomatsu had put beside his pillow. He opened one up, popping it out of its casing before giving itnto his older brother.

 

Eventually, Osomatsu had taken all his meds, sighing as he lay back down in the futon. His head should feel better when the pills take effect, but for now his brain was like a fish swimming in a tank aboard a bumpy bus ride, an after-effect of sitting upright.

 

"...don't go," he found himself mumbling, grabbing Karamatsu's arm when the younger started getting up to leave. He wasn't sure if what he said was audible at all.

Perhaps it was. Karamatsu sat back down, reached for Osomatsu's hair, missed, and ended up stabbing him in the eye.

 

Osomatsu could almost hear his own scream.

 

 

* * *


	5. Wistful Thinking

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Some things just can't happen anymore.

{I wish I could still hear your voice.}

 

Karamatsu stilled as he ran through the words his elder brother wrote onto the back of his hand. Osomatsu's grip on his palm was tight, maybe even trembling, and he could almost hear the silent sniffle from the older brother sitting in front of him.

{I wish I could still hear you,} Osomatsu wrote again. {I wish I could still hear your laugh, your words, your--} He stopped abruptly, clutching the younger's hand with both of his as he pressed it into his forehead, making a quiet sob.

 

Karamatsu brought his hand up, lightly landing it on the back of Osomatsu's.

{I wish I could still see your smile.}

Now Osomatsu was  _really_ crying, probably unaware of the volume he was crying at. Karamatsu reached for Osomatsu's face, pushing away the tears that had streaked down his cheeks.

 

He wrapped his arms around his elder brother's neck, pulling him closer, letting Osomatsu cling to him as he sobbed.

Eventually, the older brother had fallen asleep with his head resting in Karamatsu's shoulder, evident by the snores emanating from him, vibrating through the air.

 

"...i wish i could still see you," Karamatsu breathed quietly, mostly to himself, as he rest his cheek against the top of Osomatsu's head.

 

 

* * *

 

 

"Karamatsu-nii-san?"

"Yes, my dear Totty?"

"Why are you crying?

"...Eh?"

 

Karamatsu reached for his own cheek, finding that it was now damp after recalling what had happened earlier. He wiped the tears away hurriedly. "A-Ah, um, I've got something in my eye..."

Todomatsu sighed audibly, and there was the sound of his clothes shifting. "What happened this morning when you two were upstairs? And why hasn't Osomatsu-nii-san left the bedroom since?"

"It's, um, a bit of a private matter, brother," Karamatsu said quietly, stating as such only because he knew Osomatsu wouldn't want him sharing the fact. "An  _oldest-brothers_  thing..."

 

"Geez, I know you guys have your little  _choukei_  secrets or whatever, but we're here to help, you know?" He could hear the concern in Todomatsu's voice. "We all are."

"Yes, I... we  _know_ , but..." Karamatsu paused to sigh. "...when it's about something that can't really be  _solved_ , I'm not exactly sure what to  _say_..."

 

 

There was silence for a moment.

 

 

"....You two aren't broken, you know."

"Hm?"

"You're not broken. Neither of you are."

"Todomatsu, I'm _**blind**_ ," Karamatsu almost hissed. "And Osomatsu's  _ **deaf**! _We can  _barely_  hold a smooth conversation with each other anymore because of that  _stupid_ accident! You  _can't_  tell me that nothing's  _wrong_  with me when I've seen colours and sunsets and  _faces_  before, and now I  _ **can't**_. You  _c--_  You can't tell  _Osomatsu_  that nothing's wrong when he's heard music and birds and  _voices_  before, and now he  _ **can't!**_  We  _ **lost**_ our senses because of some-- some  _stupid **fucking**_  restaurant and if we  _hadn't_ been in there in the  _first_ place then  _ **none**_ of this would have _fucking_   **happened** \--!!"

 

Two arms wrapped around Karamatsu from behind, halting his tearful ramblings. Which was weird, because he was pretty sure Todomatsu had been  _in front_  of him this entire time, sound directions considered.

The body embracing his was warm.

 

"...osomatsu...?"

Osomatsu shushed him quietly, simply squeezing him tighter, burying his own face into the back of Karamatsu's hoodie. "...shh, shhh..."

 

 

Slowly, Karamatsu released the tension in his body, melting into the hug. He pressed the side of his face into the (presumably red) cloth of Osomatsu's clothes, the soft fabric's scent familiar and homely. Karamatsu closed his blind eyes as he sighed.

 

You don't need to see, or  _hear_ , to love and be loved.

And Karamatsu thought it to be a wonderful thing.

 

 

Karamatsu reached his hand up to hug back, missed somehow, and snagged his fingers into a tangled part of Osomatsu's hair.

In an attempt to get his hand out, he had yanked at the hair a little too hard. He was told it didn't leave a bald spot, but it's not like he would know any better....

At least Osomatsu got a laugh out of it, with that earnest joy in his voice. Despite the pain of having some of his hair ripped out.

 

 

* * *


	6. Blindly Wandering

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> he's blind as shit fam

 

"...Todomatsu?"

 

Karamatsu waved his probing cane around slowly as he stepped forward cautiously, only to end up colliding with a lamp post, what was probably the foot of a stall, and what sounded like a trash can.

"Todomatsu!?" he called out again, over the bustle of the people in the market. "Oi, Todomatsu, where did you go!?"

 

"....osomatsu...?"

 

 

Well, seems like he's lost now. He's surprised this didn't happen sooner, if he's to be honest. They must have lost him in the crowd of the market - maybe they should have heeded Osomatsu's word that  _this was a bad idea_.

First thing's first. If he got to a more open area, it should be easier for them to see him. The travelling market was set up in the park - If he got himself to the big fountain in the centre of the park, that would be ideal.

 

Now, the problem was  _getting_  himself there. He was trying to listen for the sound of water, but there were too many noises going on around him; the sounds of people talking and moving around him, the sounds of dollar notes being sifted through, the sounds of wallets, the sounds of plastics, the sound-- the sound of  _footsteps_ and  _coins_ and  _ **things**  there were just  **so many**_ **noises--**

Karamatsu shook his head, trying to shake out the clamourous sounds. He needs to get himself somewhere emptier. Somewhere quieter.

Somewhere else.

 

 

He made his way out of the crowd slowly, mumbling apologies every time his cane hit someone's leg or foot, and apologising  _profusely_  when he had apparently slapped a child in the face with his stick.

 

The air's colder now, Karamatsu thought to himself. He couldn't feel many human presences around him anymore, either. Seems like he's in a more open area now, so that's step one complete.

Of course, being in a more open area means his probing cane has nothing to collide into except the ground, so essentially, he has  _no idea_  where he  _actually is_. He could be in the void with nothing but the floor under him for all he knew. Then again, the distant sounds of the market would suggest otherwise...

Anyway, step two of his flawless two part plan for being found -  _waiting_.

 

Perhaps not "flawless", really, because he still could be in the darkness of the void for all he knew. Maybe he should try finding out  _where_  he is first, that would at least give him a little peace of mind...

He  _had_  considered speaking up to  _ask_  someone, but... he doesn't want to  _trouble_ them, y'know? They're probably busy checking stuff out in the market, or making their way to the market, or making their way home, perhaps, or...

 

 

His probing cane clanged into something metal, the object stuck into the ground, but it didn't feel or  _sound_  dense enough to be a lamp post. He grabbed at it, trying to feel what it was. Running his hand up the metal, there was a flat-ish metal surface, lines embedded on the top. He tried to feel for any words.

"....y..ou... ar..e... h..ere..."

Jackpot.

 

Karamatsu ran his hands across the map of the park, trying to decipher the rest of it. Seems like he was at... what feels like the corner of the park. Damn it, he must have gone the wrong way trying to get out of the crowd of the travelling market. He can't really blame himself though - he's  _literally blind_ , after all...

If he wanted to get to the centre of the park, where the big fountain is, chances are that would involve going through the crowd again. He might get turned around in there and get even  _more_ lost. Should he just... stay where he is? Or should he risk it? Or maybe he could even try to...?

_"KARAMATSU..!!"_  a shaky, unstable,  _distinct_  voice yelled from a distance.

Oh, well, nevermind all that then.

 

 

He turned to his right, the direction of Osomatsu's voice, before his older brother promptly knocked the wind out of him by crashing into him in a desperate attempt of a hug.

He was so warm. So nice and warm. It feels like home.

 

He could feel Osomatsu's heart hammering away at his chest, in contact with Karamatsu's own, as they hugged for the longest while. Then Osomatsu cupped the younger's face with his hands, and Karamatsu could feel the elder's eyes roam over his entire self, as though to check if he was hurt.

He felt something place itself on his forehead, something warm and homely and  _loving_ , before Osomatsu's hand clutched his and led the way home.

 

 

* * *

 

 

His immediate younger brother was asleep beside him on the couch. And by that, he meant Karamatsu was sleeping  _on_  him, on the couch, because by some bizzarre method of movement in his sleep Karamatsu managed to roll himself onto Osomatsu and use him as his own personal mattress.

 

With nothing much else to do, the elder took the time to groom Karamatsu's hair, combing out the tangles that were caused by him moving in his sleep. He could feel vibrations emanating from Karamatsu's chest - Perhaps he was snoring, but because Osomatsu couldn't  _hear_  the snores it just felt like he was  _purring_  instead. What a goddamn cute baby brother he had.

 

He'd hate to lose him.

 

Which was why he panicked so much when he and Todomatsu lost him in the market earlier that day. He handsigned all kinds of anxious ramblings to his youngest brother panickedly when he first found out, so fast that Todomatsu couldn't even keep up.

His panicked signing continued even as they searched, and now Osomatsu's arms had gone sore from all the fast hand movements he had done. He's not entirely sure why he had kept going with his signs even when Todomatsu wasn't looking - maybe it was just his way of coping with Karamatsu's absence...

 

 

Karamatsu moving on top of him brought him out of his thoughts. The younger, essentially still asleep,  _blindly_  crawled himself up to Osomatsu's face before nuzzling into Osomatsu's neck, a relaxed smile falling onto his face afterwards. The purring resumed soon after.

 

Goddamnit, why's his little baby brother got to be so damn cute. Osomatsu planted a kiss into the back of his younger brother's head, stroking through his hair.

He'd never want to lose him.

 

 

* * *


	7. Happy Day of Being Born

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> this is a month late. whoops. i started this like right before their birthday but never got around to posting it

He saw his little brother  _blindly_  reaching around his area at the table, so Osomatsu brought his arm over and let him bump into it. Karamatsu grabbed at his hand, writing onto it.

{What date is it?}

Osomatsu blinked. The date? He looked around the living room, but they didn't have a hanging calendar in here, so he pulled out his phone to check instead. Why was Karamatsu interested in the date, anyway?

 

{Thursday, 24th May,} Osomatsu replied in writing.

Karamatsu smiled. {Today's our birthday, isn't it?}

...Was it? Their birthday is... Oh.

It really  _was_. Osomatsu hadn't even realised the fact. Why didn't he? How old were they all now, even...?

{Osomatsu?} the younger wrote when met with no response.

 

{I didn't even realise that,} was Osomatsu's late reply.

Karamatsu visibly chuckled a little. {We should do something special for it.}

{What do you wanna do?}

{I,} Karamatsu's writing paused, contemplating his request, {I want to try baking a cake, I think. For all of us.}

 

Baking a cake, blind. Not the worst thing he's wanted to do, honestly. Once he tried to help with cutting the vegetables for soup and he nearly sliced his fingers because  _he couldn't hecking see_.

{Well, you can't do that alone,} Osomatsu replied. {Or, at least, I won't let you.}

{I thought so.} Karamatsu smirked. {Shall we?}

 

 

* * *

 

 

{Kara that's not flour,} Osomatsu wrote hurriedly, {that's sugar.}

Well,  _who_  told the sugar company to make their  _bags_  so  _similar_  to the  _flours!?_

 

Regardless, it would have been bad if he had dumped that  _entire cup of sugar_ into the bowl with the baking soda (which would make taking any of it out  _impossible_ ), so it's a good thing his elder brother caught him. Karamatsu poured the rest of the cupful of sugar back into the bag, making sure that it wouldn't spill to the best of his ability.

 

 

He smelled vanilla in the air when the vanilla extract was added into the other bowl, the bowl that had the mixed eggs and butter, and then the whisk was pushed back into his hand. Happy to comply, Karamatsu continued mixing the ingredients in the bowl, stopping only when Osomatsu tapped his hand so that he could pour in the dry ingredients, like the flour - the  _actual_  flour - and baking soda. He resumed his stirring when his hand was tapped again, making sure to go slow since he  _can't see_  if anything was on the verge of spilling or not.

Eventually the mixture became smoother. "Creamier" was probably the term the recipe used... He's taking a guess here, honestly, since he can't actually  _read_  the recipe. He's just glad Osomatsu's willing to help him with this at  _all_.

 

Karamatsu heard the soft clatter of metal against the kitchen counter. His elder brother's hands closed around his on the mixing bowl, and Osomatsu guided him into pouring the mixture into the metal baking pan. Then there was the sound of the oven opening before the pan was slid in. The oven dial clicked a few times as it was rotated, before the ticking of the oven's timer began.

Karamatsu kind of wished he could do more of this stuff by himself (rather than just standing there and listening), without bothering his brother like this for something  _he_  wanted to do. But, he  _is_ literally,  _utterly **blind**_....

 

 

Sometimes he just wished  _the incident_ had never happened in the first place.

 

 

He heard a sound - a  _voice_ , rather, that sounded like an utterance vaguely along the lines of "Karamatsu". He wasn't entirely sure, but Karamatsu brought his head up to face the direction of the sound anyway.

He suddenly felt a source of warmth near his face, before it gently bumped against his forehead. He felt two eyes on him, looking, perhaps  _staring_  at him, but there was a gentle aura to the gaze. Then the warmth pressed itself into his forehead and nosebridge, a sigh of air brushing against his cheek.

 

"...osomatsu?"

No response. Obviously.

 

The elder's hand went up to Karamatsu's ear, his thumb rubbing against the top of the cartilage. Afterwards, as Osomatsu pulled his own face away, the same hand cupped Karamatsu's face, the thumb brushing against the front of his cheekbone, below his eye. Karamatsu just leaned into the touch.

 

 

Osomatsu's other hand reached up to Karamatsu's chest before writing onto it.

{If I could be blind in your stead, I would.}

"Osomatsu..." the younger found himself saying.

No response.

 

Karamatsu brought his own hand up, reaching for Osomatsu. {If you did that, you'd be blind  _and_  deaf...}

{I don't care.} There was a pause in the elder's writing. {...I'd give my life to let you  _see_  again.}

{ _Osomatsu_.} Karamatsu very literally italicised his writing. {...What's happened has happened. We can't reverse or modify it. This is just how it is, and I ju} Karamatsu stopped his writing abruptly, pausing for a moment. {Now I just need  _you_. That's all.}

 

There was a moment of silence - both literally and in terms of their communcating. Then Osomatsu's hand landed on Karamatsu's, closing around it, squeezing it. Quietly, almost silently, the older brother sighed, before Karamatsu found himself engulfed in warmth.

It was so warm, so soft. It was like being immersed in a cloud, basking in the sun's rays.

It felt like home. He sank into the warmth, taking it all in.

 

 

When Osomatsu finally pulled away from the hug, he wrote {Let's go eat some snacks or something while waiting.}

 

 

* * *

 

 

He saw his little brother suddenly perk up, pausing his eating and turning his head around. Osomatsu guessed that he heard the oven timer go off or something. The cake should be done, then.

 

He took hold of Karamatsu's hand. Karamatsu squeezed his own and smiled, standing up quickly and looking  _visibly_  excited. The elder could practically see the sparkles emanating off from him. Hell, was he bouncing?

Osomatsu led his brother over to the kitchen, making sure he stood to one side so that the hot oven pan wouldn't accidentally touch him.

The cake looked good. Smells good, too. Poking a knife into the centre of it confirmed that it was fully cooked. He'd call the cake a success, but they'd need to taste it to be sure.

 

 

Before that, though, Karamatsu wanted to add icing to the cake, and for whatever reason he was  _deadset_  on doing it himself. So Osomatsu set Karamatsu in front of the cake and passed the piping bag into his hand, before stepping back and leaving him to his own devices.

He watched Karamatsu run his hand over the surface area of the cake, feeling how big it was, before piping a blob of icing onto it. Then he reached for the cake spatula (missing a few times, accidentally colliding with the kitchen counter and a plate instead) to spread the icing over the cake. He put a little more icing and spread it, and repeated this step until the whole cake was covered in icing.

A little unevenly, sure, but impressive for a blind man's standards.

 

Karamatsu began turning his head around, reaching around his area at the kitchen counter, but seeming unsatisfied with whatever he found. Osomatsu chose to walk over, taking hold of his hand and writing {Whatcha need?}

{Sprinkles,} the younger replied.

 

Osomatsu grabbed the bottle of rainbow-coloured sprinkles he had found in the kitchen cupboard, handing it over. Karamatsu smiled, a quick way of saying thanks, before dashing the sprinkles all over the cake.

All over the cake, the plate the cake was on,  _and_  the  _kitchen counter_ , Osomatsu should add. He's gonna have to clean that up later. Did some of them fall off onto the floor?

 

 

Karamatsu stepped back when he was done, marvelling in his own creation. Or, at least, he  _would_  have, if he could actually  _see_ it.

{It looks great,} Osomatsu stated.

The younger's smile seemed uneasy, perhaps uncertain. {Rally?} he wrote, probably having intended to spell "really".

{Yeah! The others are gonna love it, too!}

He saw his little brother's smile become a little brighter, a little more sincere. Karamatsu wrote a quick {Thx} with one hand as he covered his face with the other, trying to hide his happy expression.

 

His baby brother was so  _cute_ , Osomatsu thought to himself as he stepped forward, planting a kiss onto the younger's forehead. He could swear that he saw large bright sparkles burst out of Karamatsu soon after.

 

 

* * *

 

 

Osomatsu was quietly singing happy birthday to himself while bringing the cake into the living room, completely unaware that  _the entire room_  had decided to go silent to listen to him. When he stopped, he found himself surrounded by literally every single one of his little brothers who all began saying things in exclamation, and was, understandably, surprised and confused.

Among what was said was "OSOMATSU-NII-SAN HOW THE HELL CAN YOU STILL SING SO GOOD" and "OSOMATSU I LOVE YOUR VOICE," but it's not like Osomatsu could  _hear_  any of it anyway. He settled for laughing uncertainly, perhaps  _nervously,_  for he had no idea that literally  _everyone_ heard him singing.

 

 

"The cake is beautiful, Karamatsu-nii-san!!" Todomatsu exclaimed, audibly snapping dozens of photos of (presumably) the cake with his phone. "You decorated it yourself?"

"Why of course!" Karamatsu grinned, skilfully spinning his sunglasses and flipping it onto his own face in one smooth motion. "A connosieur of the arts will always have that innocuous fine degree of touch!" His grin then started to fade slowly. "I did, however, require Osomatsu's help with every other part of making the cake, though..." he admitted.

"Awww, Osomatsu-nii-san helped you bake??" Todomatsu sang. "That's so sweet...!!"

"Hmm...?" 

 

Karamatsu heard the cake knife slicing through the cake, and the slices were, presumably, distributed atop plates to everyone in the room. He felt the plastic of a disposable plate bump into his arm, indicating his own slice. He reached his hands up to grab the plate... only to find that it disappeared from where it was.

"Um, Osomatsu...?"

Osomatsu chuckled audibly, and then Karamatsu heard the plastic spoon (or fork?) softly clack against the plate. There was the sound of some sort of scooping motion against the plastic, and then two soft taps with the back of a hand at the side of his cheek.

 

 

Really?  _Now?_  He's already gone past the era of  _blindly_  slapping food into his own face as a result of missing his own opening. Not that it  _doesn't_  still happen every now and then, but....

Karamatsu sighed, begrudgingly opening his mouth and allowing Osomatsu to spoonfeed (or forkfeed...??) him the piece of cake.

... _yim yum_. The cake wasn't  _too_  sweet (thank  _God_  for that), and the texture was soft and fluffy, but not too dry. Top it all off with the sprinkles and icing, and you've got yourself what is, daresay, a  _perfect_  cake.

 

Karamatsu reached his hands up, grabbing at Osomatsu's arms, his method of asking for more. His efforts were quickly rewarded, earning him another spoonful (or forkful???) of cake. This repeated for a while, until Osomatsu double-tapped the plate with the...  _eating utensil_ , to indicate that this slice of cake was finished.

Now that he thought about it, it was probably a  _spork_. He did that on purpose, didn't he!? To confuse him!?

 

He heard another slice of cake being cut, and then placed onto a plate, before another  _sporkful_  of cake was pushed into his mouth. He could hear Osomatsu chuckle softly afterwards as he chewed.

He half-grumbled, half-sighed. It's not like he could  _deny_  the fact - the fact that there's a certain kind of happiness to being  _pampered_  like this - but  _still_...

 

 

He felt a warmth crash into him from the side, and tried his best to look annoyed as his elder brother slung an arm over his neck and leaned his entire weight into him. Despite himself, he started to smile, especially when Osomatsu's fingers continuously poked into his side. He tried to push the hand away, resulting in him tangling their fingers together instead.

His hand was warm. His  _palm_  was warm - not the sweaty kind of warm, more like... like a shirt fresh out of the dryer. He curled his fingers around Osomatsu's hand, his smile becoming more prominent by the second.

 

What a dear older brother he had.

 

 

* * *


	8. Hide and Seek

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Always good to play a game or two.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> what even. possessed me when writing this,.  
> EDIT : finally embedded the picture that was supposed to be in here

 

"Nii-sans!!" Todomatsu exclaimed as he burst into the living room, his 5 older brothers on the floor turning to his direction (or general direction, in Karamatsu's case) as he did so. "I got some free vouchers for k...."

Todomatsu's voice trailed off, his eyes focusing on Osomatsu.

"...For... what?" Choromatsu asked.

"Um..." Todomatsu lowered his hand that was holding the vouchers, his enthusiasm disappearing. "....Well, it's for  _karaoke_ , but, um... I just realised Osomatsu-nii-san probably wouldn't be able... to..."

Eyes went to the eldest, who just stared back confusedly, unable to  _hear_ anything that had been said.

 

[What is it?] he signed to the youngest.

"[N-Nothing!]" Todomatsu spoke and signed quickly, hiding the vouchers behind his back.

Something in Osomatsu's expression shifted, and he got up to investigate. Todomatsu tried to avoid him from seeing the vouchers, but to no avail.

Osomatsu stared down at the six karaoke vouchers now in his hands, having grabbed them out of Todomatsu's. [...Oh,] he signed silently, slowly. [...I see.]

 

 

"[I-I'm sorry, Osomatsu-nii-san, I completely forgot...!!]" Todomatsu signed hurriedly, adding emphasis for his exclamation marks. "[I-I didn't  _choose_ for the extra vouchers I got from Atsushi-san to be  _karaoke-_ related, anyway...!]"

[No, no, it's alright,] Osomatsu signed, but his hand movements seemed a little...  _sad_. He didn't address this, instead pushing the vouchers back into Todomatsu's hands. [You guys can have fun, alright? You can invite Chibita or someone else instead, with that extra voucher you've got...]

"[Nii-san...]" Todomatsu began, but he had no follow-up, so he just dropped his hands afterwards.

 

A weight suddenly bumped into the sad, sulking Osomatsu. He turned, finding that it was his immediate younger brother.

"Todomatsu, can you help sign what I say to him?" Karamatsu requested as he grabbed onto Osomatsu's sleeves. "I'll stay home with Osomatsu instead of going for the karaoke session, if he wants me to."

Todomatsu delivered the message as such. Osomatsu gave a small, sad smile, looking a little better already - just a little. He reached for Karamatsu's hair, combing through it, the younger responding by pressing his face into Osomatsu's hoodie.

 

"Todomatsu," Choromatsu sighed, "you really need to stop taking so many pictures of them."

"But they're so cute...!!" Todomatsu whined, still holding his phone up, the camera lens directed at the oldest brothers.

 

 

* * *

 

 

"Well, we're going out," Todomatsu called out. "Karamatsu-nii-san, take care of Osomatsu-nii-san. Try to cheer him up about this whole thing."

"Will do," Karamatsu replied with a smile. "Make sure Chibita and Iyami don't take up all the karaoke time."

"Of course~"

 

The front door audibly slid shut soon after.

 

 

Karamatsu reached for his older brother, going around the perimeter of the living room's coffee table in an attempt to find him, but with no luck. Wasn't he here just a while ago? Where'd he go...?

Karamatsu stood up. "Osomatsu?" he called out, to the direction of the hallway connected to the living room. "Hey, Osomatsu?"

No response. Obviously. Not that he expected one - It's more of a force of habit that anything...

 

Karamatsu walked over to the door, missing the handle by mere inches and bumping his hand into the edge of the door instead. Still, having achieved contact with it, he slid the door open. The air in the hallway was cooler than it was in the stuffy room. It should be good to air the room a bit while he sear--

The air in front of Karamatsu suddenly got warmer, closer.

"...Osomatsu?"

 

He reached his hand out, managing to grab hold of Osomatsu's soft hoodie. Having gotten hold of his brother, Karamatsu smiled before leading him back to the coffee table (bumping his leg into the table by accident as he did so).

As they sat down, he took the elder's hand before writing onto it, having come up with an activity for them to do - A strange one, but one that should make Osomatsu cheer up and feel better about all this.

{Let's play hide and seek.}

 

 

He could, quite literally, feel the absolutely  _incredulous_ look Osomatsu was giving him. He couldn't help but laugh as a result. {It'll be fun!} he continued. {As long as you give me a fair chance, of course.}

{Karamatsu,} Osomatsu began, having brought his free hand up to theirs, {you're literally  _blind_.}

 

{But that just makes it more interesting! Hell, you could hide in plain sight and just watch me fumble around trying to find you.}

He heard Osomatsu chuckle quietly, almost inaudibly. {Is this your idea of cheering me up?}

{Perhaps :3} Karamatsu wrote onto the back of his brother's palm, smiling as he drew out the meowy face. Osomatsu suddenly, very abruptly cupped his hands around Karamatsu's, stopping him from writing (or drawing) any more.

 

"...gOdDAMN IT KAghAa, you'Rhe sSo DAMN gcUTE???" Osomatsu very literally yelled out with his unstable deaf voice. Just like any other time he ever tried to speak (ever since  _the incident_ , anyway), his pronunciation was  _far_  from perfect - more  _slurred_  than anything (although he didn't  _know_  that) - but the younger brother got the message, bursting into laughter in response.

Osomatsu just ended up pressing his forehead into Karamatsu's knuckles, trying to comprehend whatever the hell his brother was.

{Alright, fine,} he finally wrote with a sigh. {Game on.}

 

 

They set the rule that Osomatsu could only hide (the word ""hide"" is used loosely here) in the living room of the house, so that Karamatsu could actually have a chance at finding him. Osomatsu set a timer on his phone and placed it on the coffee table.

A minute passed, and then the phone's timer alarm went off, the sound blasting through the air. Karamatsu reached for it, pressing the lock button on the side of the phone to stop the alarm, before beginning his search.

 

The first thing he did was sprawl himself under the coffee table and flail about. All he bumped into was the table legs, the underside of the table and the floor, so he figured Osomatsu wasn't under there. He crawled back out, heading towards the hand-chair thing that was always in the corner of the living room, but as he crawled all over it he found that Osomatsu was neither on it, nor behind it, nor under it.

He could feel two eyes on him, watching his every move, so the elder was definitely still in the room (and most definitely laughing silently to himself while watching him fumble about). Not that he thought Osomatsu would disobey against the rules that  _Osomatsu_   _himself_  set, anyway.

 

He headed over to the cupboard, reaching at its top surface; The only thing he touched was the medbox up there. The interior of the cupboard itself, he realised upon opening and feeling it, was too small to fit a human, so he turned back around.

...He came up with an idea. A dumb idea, admittedly, but if it worked it should give him a good hint of his brother's location.

 

 

He did, what was most definitely, a silly-looking  _blep_.

 

 

A stifled laugh escaped from Osomatsu, just barely audible, but enough to allow Karamatsu to narrow down his direction. He grinned, his plan having been a success, practically running over to the other side of the room.

In his haste, he had lost track of where the coffee table was in the room, it being directly in his path of movement. He tripped over it, and began to fall.

 

Two arms hurriedly caught him, stiffening quickly to break the fall. Karamatsu grabbed onto the sleeves, immediately feeling the softness of the cloth - the kind of softness you get when a  _well-loved_  hoodie is washed hundreds of times over the years.

"...Found you!" he declared, delighted to have succeeded in seeking the hidden. He tried to grab Osomatsu's hand to write onto it, to deliver the message that he had just said, but found that the hand kept slipping out of his grasp.

The hand -  _hands,_  rather - kept grabbing hold of his face, his shoulders, as though to check if he was okay. Karamatsu just smiled confusedly, maybe innocently, like he had forgotten that he was in any danger at all.

 

Perhaps he should rephrase that - He  _wasn't_  in any danger at all. He knew Osomatsu would catch him, would save him.

He's his dear older brother. He trusts him with his life.

 

 

As though Osomatsu had  _heard_  all that Karamatsu had thought, he sighed, a smile audible in it. He finally brought his hand over to the younger's, writing {Don't run so fast lmao}

{I was excited,} Karamatsu stated as he laughed. {Anyway, I found you!}

{You sure did, Kara-chan. Good job! :D} Osomatsu wrote, drawing an emoji in a similar way Karamatsu had earlier.

The younger could quite accurately imagine that very smile, that was drawn onto his hand, on Osomatsu's face. He looked happy. It made him happy.

 

{You're cute when you're smiling Kara :3c} Osomatsu wrote, emphasising his emoji.

{Shu} Karamatsu began to write, but stopped abruptly. {...i'm happy when you're happy, aniki.}

Osomatsu, rather audibly, went "awww....", in that kind of tone you do when something absolutely  _adorable_  happens, like two cats snuggling up with each other, or a baby animal sleeping. Or just...  _Karamatsu_ , in this case. Osomatsu began pinching his baby brother's cheeks, like how one would pinch a child's, moving them up and down and around.

Karamatsu just endured being considered  _cute_ rather than  _cool_. Not that it was an entirely  _bad_  thing, though - His own smile certainly still remained....

 

{Well,} Osomatsu began, {it's my turn!}

 

 

They decided that Karamatsu could hide anywhere in the house, and Osomatsu would either clap or call out every once in a while to let Karamatsu know of whether he was getting nearer or not. He wouldn't want to shock him by suddenly grabbing him from his hiding place without a single warning, anyway.

The two-minute timer of the elder's phone began ticking down, and Karamatsu set off to search for a hiding spot.

 

He heard the timer-alarm go off downstairs, right as he climbed into the empty bathtub of the bathroom, hiding himself in it. A clap sound went off, before silence.

For a while, it was just darkness. Just the ceramic of the bathtub surface beneath him. Just him and the bathtub. For a while, he considered the possibility that Osomatsu might have forgotten about him, until a clap went off again, sounding like it was at the base of the staircase.

"Kaallhamatsu~" Osomatsu called out in a singsong voice. "Wheehre aar yuu~?" he sang, his pronunciation completely botched but still understandable.

Karamatsu chuckled, rather loudly. "I am here~!" he called out, despite full knowledge that his brother couldn't hear him.

 

"Karrhaamatshuu~" Osomatsu sang, sounding like he was making his way up the stairs. "Wherr ar you~?"

"I am here~!"

"Kaaramaahtssu~" Osomatsu sang, sounding like he was at the door of the  _very room_ Karamatsu was in, his voice echoing off the bathroom walls.

"I'm right here~!" Karamatsu replied in anticipation.

 

....

 

"Kaghamahtsuu~" Osomatsu called out, sounding like he had  _walked right back out_  and into the hallway.

Karamatsu burst into laughter. So close, yet so far! Dear,  _deaf_  brother of his...!

 

 

Osomatsu continued to call out or clap, sounding like he was searching in their bedroom, before his voice returned to the hallway outside the bathroom.

 

 

"Kaahlla-chann~" Osomatsu sang, his voice inside the bathroom once more. Karamatsu just held his breath in anticipation, again.

And then Osomatsu scooped him out of the bathtub, spinning around with him in his arms as he laughed. Karamatsu laughed as well, coiling his arms around the neck of the man carrying him in an attempt of a hug.

 

The laughs eventually calmed down, and Osomatsu just held him close. Just pressed their foreheads together. Despite being unable to  _see_ , Karamatsu could  _feel_  the warm smile Osomatsu was giving him, and reciprocated it. Despite being unable to  _hear_ , Osomatsu could  _feel_  the wordless message Karamatsu wished to convey - Just happy that Osomatsu had cheered up, having forgetten the sadness that he had had just earlier that day.

Like this was meant to be. Like, even with their  _impairing_  disabilities, they could communicate regardless and have a happily ever after.

As long as they're together,  _there_  for each other.... they're  _happy_.

 

Karamatsu nuzzled into his brother, fully willing to spend a forever and many more with him. As did Osomatsu.

 

 

Osomatsu then began to walk, Karamatsu still in his arms, and when he finally set him down Karamatsu found that he now lay on the couch cushions in their bedroom. A weight carefully landed at his side, squeezing into his space to be able to fit on the sofa with him.

Seemed like his older brother wanted to take a nap? The arms wrapping around him, as Osomatsu's forehead rested against the back of his neck, very much suggested as such. Karamatsu certainly wouldn't mind...

 

He placed his hands on the arm around his torso, feeling the warmth of it. Did Osomatsu always hug him this much before  _the incident_? He knew him to be the huggy (perhaps  _cuddly_ ) type, but it felt like the number of times Osomatsu hurled his arms around him and squeezed him had multiplied tenfold, ever since he had gone blind and  _he_ had gone deaf.

The sense of touch was one of the few remaining senses they still had in common. One of the few that was  _left_.

 

Osomatsu wriggling his fingers at the sides of his waist brought him out of his thoughts, making him elbow the elder (lightly, playfully) in the gut.

 

 

 

* * *

 

 

 

"...s..."

"SO CUTE!!!" Todomatsu practically  _yelled_  out loud, whipping his phone out and snapping away at the two oldest brothers cuddling in their  _sleep_  on the couch.

"We leave for karaoke for 2 hours, and they end up like... whatever  _this_  is," Choromatsu sighed. "Typical eldest..."

"They're cute!!" Jyuushimatsu exclaimed, clapping his long yellow sleeves together, before stopping abruptly. "Oh, but it's dinner time now! Should we wake them up?"

"Leave them," Ichimatsu huffed. "Chances are they won't wake up for the next few hours."

"They'd be grumpy if they got woken up, anyway," Todomatsu laughed. "Let's just save their dinner share for them~"

 

The four younger brothers headed back down the stairs for their dinner.

 

 

 

* * *

 


	9. Into an Escapade

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> quick question oso, what the _hell_ are you doing

"What do you mean you haven't seen him?"

"I  _mean_ I haven't  _seen_  him!" Todomatsu exclaimed to his blind older brother sitting at the coffee table. "He left the house right after breakfast and now it's almost  _dinnertime!_  I've asked everyone else, too," the youngest stated, referring to his other older brothers, "but no one's heard from him at all!"

"I had assumed he went out with you and Ichimatsu when you two went shopping..." Karamatsu mumbled.

"He wasn't with us. And he hasn't answered, or even  _read_ , any of my text messages," Todomatsu huffed in mild frustration. "He can  _see_ , sure, but he's  _deaf_  and that isn't exactly  _ideal_  at night... Any idea where he could be?"

"I-I'd guess the pachinko parlour or the park, perhaps, but I wouldn't know any better..."

 

"Mmh.... Well, I'll walk around and ask Dekapan-san or whoever if they've seen him," Todomatsu stated, the sound of him slipping into his shoes audible even from the living room. "And Karamatsu-nii-san, don't be a dumb butt."

Karamatsu blinked. "What."

"I said don't be a dumb butt," Todomatsu repeated. "Stay at home, don't try to go looking for him. You're literally  _blind_ , nii-san."

Karamatsu hadn't expected his mind to be read so quickly. "I... I suppose I'll stay at home. In case he returns..."

He could hear Todomatsu's smile. "Thanks, nii-san. Answer the house phone if it rings, okay? I'll call if I find him or anything."

"A-Alright."

 

Karamatsu heard the front door click shut, before the youngest's footsteps away from the house faded off.

 

 

Karamatsu simply sat there in the living room, continuing to sip his tea while listening to the TV's audio as he waited.

An hour passed. Or was it 15 minutes? Perhaps 3 hours? He couldn't really tell the difference. And he can't  _look_  at a clock to check the time, either... Regardless, there was still no sign of Osomatsu - or  _anyone else_  in the house, really. Were the others looking for the eldest, too? He hasn't heard anything other than the TV's drama channel...

 

Well, looks like it's time to be a "dumb butt", as Todomatsu put it.

 

 

He put on his shoes ( _boots_ , actually, since his boots are physically unique from the other shoes in the house, and he wouldn't want to accidentally wear  _two different shoes of different colours_ ) before grabbing firm hold of his probing cane. Sliding open the front door, he could hear the birds flapping across the sky, the footsteps of people walking about the town.

 

This is a dumb idea, he thought to himself. He's being a dumb butt, he repeated to himself.

Still, he took a step forward. Many, in fact. Down the familiar path from the house to the park.

 

 

Should memory serve him correctly, he should be reaching the park, if not already be  _in_  the park, at this point... And he certainly was, feeling the angle of the audibly wooden bridge he was now walking on, hearing the flow of the water in the river that the bridge allowed passage over.

He used to come here alone all the time. Before he became  _blind_ , anyway. He remembered the sights that he used to see as he leaned against the bridge railing while the sun set. Had the  _incident_  not happened, he would currently be seeing the sun's rays shining over the shimmering water, the sky dyed orange, a gradient that gradually became a dark blue, signalling the entry of the night.

But the incident  _had_  happened, and now... now he can't see  _anything_.

He can't see anything at all.

 

...But he can still hear.

He can still hear the leaves crinkling in the wind, the chirps of the birds in their nests. He could hear the splashes of the water, the branches rustling as they crashed into each other. He could hear a distant windchime, he could hear footsteps getting louder...

....Footsteps getting louder?

Someone's approaching him.

 

 

"T-Todomatsu? Is that you? I-I know you told me not to leave the house, b-but..."

No response. No response at all.

"...osomatsu...?"

Karamatsu felt his hand grabbed, gently, before another hand wrote onto the back of it.

{What are you doing here?}

 

{We were looking for  _you!_  Where have you been all  _day_ , Osomatsu? We've been worried!}

There was no response.

{....osomatsu?}

 

{...Hey, Karamatsu,} Osomatsu began, {let's run away.}

 

 

Karamatsu's eyes widened. {Run awa--  _Why?_ }

{ _They_ don't understand.} Osomatsu's grip on his brother's hand was tight. {They don't understand that we're-- That we're  _not_   ** _broken_**.}

{What do you mea--}

{They don't  _understand us_ , Karamatsu,} Osomatsu stated, interrupting Karamatsu's writing. {And they  _never will_. They think we-- They think we're  _helpless_  just because you're  _blind_ and I'm  _deaf._  But we're  ** _not!_**  Hell, you just got here to the park by yourself without anyone's help! I bet they didn't encourage that, did they!?}

{...No, they... Todomatsu didn't want me leaving the house to look for you. He--}

{He thought you  _couldn't_ , but you  _can_  and  _ **did**_. We-- We don't need them to  _babysit_  us like useless  _bloody_   _ **toddlers**! _They--}

 

{Osomatsu,} Karamatsu interrupted, having sensed a long, frustrated spiel incoming. {Did something happen this morning? Something that made you upset like this?}

He heard his older brother sigh. {....that's not important, Karamatsu.}

{It  _is_  if it made you upset.}

 

{...choromatsu's a bloody pain in the ass,} Osomatsu stated vaguely, unwilling to give any real details.

{I'm sure he was just worried, aniki...}

{I-- I get where he's coming from, but  _still,_  it just-- He just makes my blood  _ **boil**._}

{I'm certain that he didn't mean to offend you, nii-san,} Karamatsu responded with a smile. {He's definitely seen the wrong in his actions by now. I know you're upset, but brothers have to stick together, right? It's just... It's just not the same if it's not  _all_   _six_  of us in this lifetime, you know..?}

 

{...i know...} Osomatsu sighed. {...I know. But I-- It's just so _tiring_... They-- They don't understand  _anything_.}

{Maybe they don't, but I know they're trying. I'm sure of it.}

 

 

They simply stood there on the bridge for a while, still holding each other's hand.

 

 

{....can't we just... take a break from  _life_  for a while? Just... somewhere,  _anywhere_  away from  _everything_  here.} Osomatsu's hand was warm as always as he wrote. {Just-- Just the two of us for a day. Does that sound alright?}

{....I suppose it... would prove to them that we can do things on our own. But--}

 

Karamatsu didn't get to finish his sentence as he felt himself suddenly scooped off the ground, his feet in the air, his weight supported by two arms below him instead.

"O-Osomatsu!?" he exclaimed vocally, more out of surprise than anything. "W-Where are we going...??"

All he got in response was the feeling of Osomatsu's smile being beamed directly at him, as he got carried off by his brother into an escapade.

 

 

* * *

 


	10. Vacation From Home

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> i uh. don't. don't look at me. the fluff at the start is. fluff. i neeeded. i needed the fluff. don't look at me

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> please dont look at me i am. overheating from the fluff in the beginning as well.

He could feel his little brother purring beneath him as they cuddled the absolute  _hell_  out of each other, and he's never been happier.

He was over his baby brother on the soft blankets of the bed, engulfing him in warmth, whispering to him (what was probably unintelligible words), kissing his cheeks and forehead, hugging him,  _loving_ him. He felt Karamatsu's arms coiled around him, holding him close, his chest vibrating in purrs, (probably) saying and speaking sentences (that he couldn't hear).

 

 

Osomatsu had no worries of anyone interrupting their wordless heart-to-heart - They were out of their home, after all. So he cuddled him to his heart's content, his sweet little baby brother that's too damn pure and nice and kind for this damned world. He made sure there was no room for doubt, no room for uncertainty or dubiety, that he loved him to his very core.

Eventually, he got off of him and lay at his side, an arm still wrapped around him to keep him close. He could see Karamatsu's smile - wide and perhaps wobbly from bashfulness, but happy.

 

He pressed their foreheads together. "...i love you so much, karamatsu..." he tried to say, though he's fairly certain he messed up at least five fifths of the pronunciation. He saw his little brother say something in response, and though he couldn't  _hear_  what it was, he cherished the smile all the same.

 

 

He checked his phone for the time, disregarding the unread messages on it. 10.30pm... They should probably get some sleep - He wasn't much of an early sleeper himself (he's never been much of a  _sleeper_  at  _all_ , despite what he would seem...), but he knew Karamatsu would get cranky if he doesn't get enough hours.

So he kissed his little brother goodnight before turning off the lights and, despite having rented a hotel room with  _two beds_ , slept right next to his baby brother.

 

 

* * *

 

 

...Karamatsu awoke to the sound of crying.

It sounded more like sharp, frequent inhales, but a form of crying all the same.

 

He reached his hand in the direction of the sound, eventually bumping into Osomatsu's collarbone (although he was aiming for his shoulder). The elder made an inhale, more violent than any other before, as he jolted, his head whipping to his side so fast that it probably created a gust of wind, before going silent.

{What's wrong?} Karamatsu asked, writing into his brother's shoulder.

No response. The only sound heard was Osomatsu continuing his laboured breathing.

{...Are you okay?} he decided to ask afterwards.

A weight shifted on the bed. Osomatsu's hand crashed into Karamatsu's, shakily writing {ii _m_  f **i** _n_ e}.

 

Unconvinced, Karamatsu brought his hand up to his brother's face. He could feel Osomatsu taking unsteady breaths, the cheeks of his face slightly damp, the hand grabbing at the younger's wrist in an attempt to pull it away feeling clammy and cold. It sounded like the elder's breathing was getting even heavier, even more unstable.

Karamatsu just leaned himself forward, into Osomatsu's body that was now facing him. He could feel his older brother's heart working overtime, hammering away against his chest like a drum. He placed his hand on it, rubbing circles into it, feeling the pulsating heart slowly but eventually calm down.

 

 

It was a while before Osomatsu finally admitted that he had  _been_  crying in his sleep, coiling his arms around Karamatsu as he sniffled. {...bad dream,} he wrote simply, vaguely, into the younger's back.

Karamatsu figured as much. {Do you want to talk about it?}

There was no reply - no  _worded_  one, anyway. Osomatsu just tucked his brother's head under his, just pulled his brother closer as he sniffed again, before choking on a sob.

 

He cried for a while, still clutching onto Karamatsu. It was clear that he was trying to be quiet, the way he abruptly halted his sounds from getting louder. Karamatsu rubbed his older brother's back to coax him as he wept.

Eventually, the elder got exhausted from crying and, with Karamatsu still in his arms, fell back asleep.

 

 

* * *

 

 

...the light shining through the window was  _bright as all hell_. How long did they sleep? What time was it by now...?

Osomatsu yawned, before turning to his little brother still curled up against him. He was still purring in his sleep, his eyes closed peacefully. Osomatsu ran a hand through his hair to gently coax him into waking up.

 

Karamatsu opened his eyelids slowly, his blind eyes turning around before settling in one direction. The younger reached a hand out, snagging it into Osomatsu's, before smiling - that cute-ass smile belonging only to his immediate little baby brother. God, he loves him so so much.

...He cares about his other younger brothers too, of course. He's their oldest brother. They've just... been  _bothersome_  lately.  _Tiring_. They... They just don't  _understand._

Impairment doesn't mean  _helplessness_ , for God's bloody sake. He knows they're just trying to  _help_ , but...

...Or, maybe,  _ **he's**  _the one that's  _overreacting_. Maybe  _he's_  the one in the  ** _wrong_**  for  ** _overreacting_**. Maybe his  _nightmare_  last night was  _right_. Maybe the...

 

Karamatsu writing onto the back of his hand brought him out of his thoughts.

{Good morning,} the younger wrote.

{...morning.}

 

 

They checked out of the hotel soon after eating their brunch there.

 

{Are we going back home now?} Karamatsu queried as they walked hand in hand, the two of them having just gotten off the bus.

{....not yet. n...not yet,} Osomatsu replied.

{The others are probably worried...}

{...let's go somewhere else,} was all Osomatsu wrote in response.

 

 

Karamatsu's head perked up when they came to the entrance of the bird park. He must be hearing the birds inside chirping, Osomatsu thought. With the way his blind eyes lit up, practically  _sparkling_  from anticipation...

What a cute baby brother he had.

 

They headed inside, Osomatsu having paid the admission fee. The birds were a variety of beautiful colours - pink flamingoes, red parrots, blue... whatever species that is...

Karamatsu seemed to enjoy just listening to the avian sounds. The elder figured he would - that's why he brought him here. He's always gone on about the  _beauty of nature_ and things like that.

He had the widest damn smile on his face. Osomatsu was just glad he was happy.

 

Karamatsu flinched the first time one of the parakeets landed on his hand, to peck at the handful of seeds he was holding for the feeding session, but got used to the sensation of the bird's feet on his fingers after a while. More birds flew on over to him, and at some point for some reason he was practically surrounded by the birds that were probably screaming for food. He laughed, reaching out and managing to get a few of them to land on his arms and shoulders.

Frankly, he looked like a  _Disney princess_. A magical one, perhaps. He was surely enjoying himself, his bright smile sincere and his eyes closed happily.

It made Osomatsu happy.

 

Karamatsu reached for Osomatsu, transferring some of the birds over to him. One parakeet walked up to his shoulder and screamed  _directly_  into his hearing aid - it was so loud that his ears could  _actually,_ just _barely -_ with the help of his hearing aids - _pick up_  on the sound. It sounded like a very distant sound, despite the bird being literally right next to his ear.

It also sounded like a cute little shit.

The parakeet only made a squawk or two before flying off his shoulder, leaving him back in his overly-familiar deafly silence.

 

 

* * *

 

 

Karamatsu may be blind and completely unable to see his surroundings, true, but his eyes are still slightly sensitive to light - He can sense when the light around him has gotten dimmer or brighter. For an abled person, it's like how when you close your eyes, you can still tell if the lights in the room are switched on or not. Something about the light literally passing through your semi-transluscent-esque eyelids to make that weird orange glow thing you see when your eyes are closed, but that's not what we're here to talk about.

 

The younger brother could tell that the sunlight of the day had gotten dimmer, dimmer than the noon sun from earlier when they were making their way to the bird park, meaning it was possibly late afternoon approaching evening. Which leaves something to be asked, yet again...

{Osomatsu, are we heading back home now?}

 

The elder brother, abruptly, stopped in his tracks, making Karamatsu (whose hand he was holding) do the same.

{...Osomatsu?}

No response.

 

 

{...i know you don't really  _want_  to go home, but... we can't run forever, nii-san.}

 

 

{....they'll never understand,} Osomatsu stated simply, perhaps vaguely.

{But they'll try their best. They're our younger brothers...}

{...I just feel like we're being treated like some-- some useless helpless  _things_.} Osomatsu audibly sighed. {Don't you get that feeling too? Even more than  _I_ do...?}

{They're just worried, aniki... They don't want us to get hurt as a result of being unable to sense something that would endanger us.} Karamatsu squeezed the hand in his grasp. {You know they mean well, right?}

{....yeah. yeah, i know.}

 

There was a long pause of silence, then the elder sighed once more before starting his walk again, tugging his little brother along.

 

 

The pavement here is more familiar, Karamatsu thought to himself as he continually bumped his probing cane into the ground. The concrete here was lighter, less dense than previous, also smoother in comparison, and that's not even to mention that one tiny pothole that no one ever bothered to fix that his cane got stuck in momentarily.

They must be near home.

 

They stopped right in front of the gate of their house, where the concrete transitioned to gravel.

{...let's go in, aniki.}

{....yeah.}

Osomatsu audibly sucked in a deep breath before stepping forward.

 

 

* * *

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> cliiiifff hanger  
> hanging from a clifffffff  
> and that's hwy it's called cliffhangerrrr


	11. Forever Always

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> For better or for worse.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is an immediate continuation of the previous chapter!

 Osomatsu didn't know how loudly or silently he slid open the front door, but he  _did_  know that all four of their younger brothers appeared in front of them immediately after, looking like they were yelling things in exclamation.

He didn't know what Karamatsu (who was still next to him, still holding his hand) was saying to them. Probably explaining things in his stead.

...He feels like a wimp, not telling these things by himself. Not  _daring_  to explain himself, by  _himself_.

 

He's a piece of shit.

All he knew was that when Karamatsu's mouth stopped moving, no one signed or seemed to say a word. None at all. They all seemed  _upset_.

Maybe Osomatsu  _made_  them upset, by being frustrated by them just  _trying_  to  _help_. The urge to run out the door bubbled up inside him once more. To dash without stop or end. Maybe even throw himself off a bridge. That'd make everything easier.

Part of him wished he had just  _died_  instead of gone  _deaf_  from the  _incident_.

His younger brothers in front of him were still frowning, eyebrows furrowed - no sign of a smile or anything alike. Perhaps unsure of what to do, or sign, or say.

Or maybe they just wanted him out of their sight. To never return again. Because they had cared, but their care was perceived as unwanted due to his  _overreaction_ , so they now detest instead.

 

He had seen enough. Osomatsu let go of his immediate younger brother's hand, intending to storm out the door, but Karamatsu was quick to grab him again.

"Let  _go_ ," Osomatsu tried to growl, still facing the door. He wasn't sure what ended up coming out.

{No,} was what Karamatsu wrote in response.

Osomatsu tugged a few times, but the younger's grip remained. And then another, second hand landed on his arm, foreign yet familiar at the same time.

{We're sorry,} it wrote.

.... _what?_

Osomatsu turned around, finding that it was Todomatsu's hand that wrote that, with Choromatsu, Jyuushimatsu and Ichimatsu clinging to him to indicate that the message was from all of them. Wait, what the hell are they talking about? Why are  _they_  sorry?  _He's_  the one that should be sorry! He--  _He's_  the one that overreacted and they're--  _They_  were just trying to  _help_ , why are  _they_  apologising--!?

A sob forced its way out of his throat, giving Osomatsu no opportunity to supress it. He brought his arm up to his eyes in an attempt to hide the tears.

Clearly his attempt hadn't worked, because all five of his younger brothers came up to him to hug him. He wasn't sure what conclusion they had come to, or if it was anywhere near the one that his  _over-thinking brain_  had come up with, but he hugged them back all the same.

He may not look like the type, but Osomatsu over-thinks  _all_ the time, even though he never shows it. He's only got his constant anxiety - a result of not being able to live up to expectations of being the  _oldest of six_  - to thank for that. His anxiety makes him think and over-think about all sorts of  _negatives_ , about all sorts of things.

 

But even  _his_  anxiety-riddenbrain could only infer that his younger brothers were hugging him because they  _cared_. And they would probably never stop caring. They're brothers. A brotherhood never truly comes apart.

Even if, even  _though_  he's a horrible, shitty oldest brother.... they're all his brothers, and they all  _care._

 

He'd give them all the entire world if he could. They're all too kind for their own good.

He wasn't sure how long they stayed there in a six-man hugball or how long he was crying his goddamn  _heart_ out, but when he looked up again he found that everyone else had been crying too. Including Karamatsu, whose face was still buried into Osomatsu's red hoodie, his tears seeping through the fabric and soaking the eldest's skin.

When everyone else had pulled away from the hug with the eldest, Karamatsu still hadn't. He seemed to still be crying, the way his sobs vibrated through his body and emanated into Osomatsu's own. Had Osomatsu scared him by trying to run off again? His dear, sweet, blind little baby brother...

Osomatsu wrapped his arms around him again, carding through his hair. Perhaps some mistakes had been made recently...

They're family. They'll stick together.

They  _all_  will.

 

 

 

* * *

 

 

 

"[So now, Osomatsu-nii-san and Ichimatsu-nii-san swap positions, so our eldest brothers can sleep next to each other in our futon,]" Todomatsu stated, one hand holding the pointer directed at the whiteboard, depicting the new sleeping plan, while his other hand signed what he said. "[Then they can do their cutesy shit or whatever while sleeping.]"

"Their  _what_ now?"

"[I mean, let's face it,]" Todomatsu began with a smile, facing his green-clad brother who had uttered that response, "[Osomatsu-nii-san is closest to Karamatsu-nii-san - because they understand each other the most - and vice-versa. If any problems happen in the night or right before sleeping, they'd probably go to each other first. Putting them next to each other just speeds up the process!]"

"Makes sense to me!!" Jyuushimatsu exclaimed.

"...if it'll make things easier, i guess i can tolerate sleeping next to Shikomatsu," Ichimatsu huffed.

"Shiko- _what!?_ "

 

"This is, um, very kind of you all," Karamatsu noted. "...Thank you."

"[Yeah, well, it's for the best, really,]" Todomatsu shrugged. "[It's fitting for you two to be each other's main support! Plus, now I'll be able to take more pictures of you two hugging the heck out of each other and use those to embarrass Osomatsu-nii-san into doing stuff like eating breakfast.]"

"you what now"

 

 

* * *

 

 

As soon as Karamatsu settled into his spot in the futon, he reached for his older brother, who joined him soon after.

The elder was warm as always, the cloth of his pajamas soft. Karamatsu practically rolled onto him, clutching onto him, resting his ear against his chest to hear his calm heartbeat. He tried to match his breathing with it.

...and then some tears began to leak out of his eyes. He wasn't exactly sure why. Just listening to his elder brother's heartbeat, just hearing his...  _life_.

Just being alive  _with_  him. It was wonderful.

...Maybe he was just crying because he's happy.

 

Osomatsu's hand pressed into his cheek, rubbing away his tears. Karamatsu smiled in response, crawling himself up to the elder's face and nuzzling into the crook of Osomatsu's neck. He could hear the vague sound of a phone camera snapping away, but he willed himself to ignore it.

He closed his eyes as Osomatsu wrapped his arms around him, quickly drifting off to sleep in the comfort of his older brother's arms.

 

It doesn't matter that one of them's blind and the other is deaf - They can communicate  _without_  speech, or signing, or even  _words_. They'll always have each other, and they'll  _also_  always have their younger brothers, to help them through this enigma of life.

And they were happy.

 

 

 

* * *

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thanks for reading! this was fun dhsjghjkshg why are they so happy


End file.
